Thursday, July 16, 2009

Brother Rice H.S. Wins United Nations Foundation Global Debates

Brother Rice High School (www.brrice.edu) was selected as a winner in an international debate competition and will travel to New York City this week for a Youth Leadership Summit, July 15-18. The United Nations Foundation’s Global Debates program, which engages more than 2,000 high schools from 90 countries in climate change debates and action, will bring 150 students and teachers from seven countries to the United Nations. They will spend three days immersed in panel discussions with UN leadership, workshops on climate science from grassroots youth activists, and service with local organizations working to offset climate change in New York City. “We have been incredibly impressed by the thousands of students who took part in the 2008 and 2009 Global Debates,” said Kaitlin Barry, Director of the UN Foundation’s Campus Outreach. “It is inspiring to see students create detailed Climate Change Action Plans, debate whether or not developed nations have a higher obligation to combat global warming, and work with their communities to engage everyday people in climate action. This year’s summit will bring together the most active Global Debates schools and celebrate the enthusiasm of these impressive young leaders.”Each team participating in the Youth Leadership Summit consists of four to six students accompanied by two of their Global Debate teachers. UN Foundation Senior Advisor Gillian Sorensen and Janos Pasztor, the director of the UN’s Secretary-General’s Climate Change Support Team will be among the featured speakers. Youth climate activists from 350.org will help the Summit students prepare detailed grassroots organizing plans for International Day of Climate Action, which will take place on UN Day, October 24th, 2009. Lastly, partners such as Goldman Sachs and the New York Restoration project will support participants in their efforts to engage in local environmental service. “The UN-sponsored Youth Summit was the culmination of a year’s worth of experience that will carry with me through the rest of my life,” said Brother Rice sophomore Evan Hebert, who attended last year’s World Youth Summit. “Going to New York, meeting other students from around the globe with similar interests, and hearing lectures from some of the leaders in climate science were all opportunities to share my views and defend them in a forum that was both open and informative.”Brother Rice Debate Coach and Speech Teacher Nancy Lauer added: “Our guys have accumulated more than 30,000 points throughout the school year to earn this distinction among other schools. But the main thing they have learned is what it means to become active participants in making a difference in the world in which they live. It is such a wonderful experience to communicate with students from around the globe and work together.” Global Debate Winners from Rice attending this year’s Summit will be: Seniors Alex Tolksdorf, Damon Tang, Robert Armstrong and Junior William Giorgio. The top 10 U.S. schools and top six international schools who have won a trip to the Summit include: Madison Central High School, Madison, Mississippi; Brother Rice High School, Bloomfield Hills, Michigan; Kerr High School, Houston, Texas; Santee High School, Los Angeles, California; Northern Utah Academy for Math, Engineering & Science, Layton, Utah; Princeton High School, Princeton, Texas; Del Valle High School, Del Valle, Texas; Monsignor Kelly High School, Beaumont, Texas; Norman High School, Norman, Oklahoma, Kearney High School, Kearney, Nebraska; Prometeu-Prim, Chisinau, Moldova; Liceul Academiei de Stiinte, Straseni, Moldova; Hobby School, Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia; Secondary School of Mathematics “Baba Tonka,” Rousse, Bulgaria; CheongShim International, Gyeonggi-do, Korea; Kolej Tuanku Ja’afar, Mantin, Malaysia. For more information about the UN Foundation’s Global Debates and Youth Leadership Summit, visit http://www.unfoundation.org/our-impact/engaging-youth/the-global-debates.html.About the UN Foundation The United Nations Foundation is an advocate for the UN and a platform for connecting people, ideas, and capital to help the United Nations solve global problems. We build partnerships, grow constituencies, mobilize resources and advocate policy changes to support the UN’s work for individual and global progress. The UN Foundation’s work - focused on select global problems - is decreasing child mortality, improving disaster relief, protecting diverse cultures and environments, creating a clean energy future, empowering women and girls, and improving U.S.-UN relations. About Brother Rice Brother Rice High School is a private, fully accredited, four-year Catholic College Preparatory school for young men. Brother Rice was founded in 1960 by the Congregation of Christian Brothers of Irelan

Past warming shows gaps in climate knowledge - study

A dramatic warming of the planet 55 million years ago cannot be solely explained by a surge in carbon dioxide levels, a study shows, highlighting gaps in scientists' understanding of impacts from rapid climate change.
During an event called the Palaeocene-Eocene Thermal Maximum, global temperatures rose between 5 and 9 degrees Celsius within several thousand years. The world at that time was already warmer than now with no surface ice.
"We now believe that the CO2 did not cause all the warming, that there were additional factors," said Richard Zeebe, an oceanographer with the University of Hawaii at Manoa.
"There may have been an initial trigger," he told Reuters on Wednesday from Hawaii. This could be a deep ocean warming that caused a catastrophic release of methane from hydrate deposits under the seabed.
Methane is a potent greenhouse gas but much of it is oxidised into CO2 when it is released from hydrate deposits.
Zeebe and his colleagues estimated the amount of CO2 released during the Palaeocene-Eocene event by studying sediment cores from seabeds around the globe. Their study is published in the latest issue of Nature Geoscience.


They estimated about 3 trillion tonnes of carbon (11 trillion tonnes of CO2) was released over several thousand years from the methane deposits, leading to a 70 percent rise in atmospheric CO2 levels from pre-event levels.
But Zeebe said this could only explain a 1 to 3.5 degree Celsius rise in temperatures, adding that a commonly accepted scientific range for a doubling of CO2 is between 1.5 and 4.5 degrees Celsius.
This meant other factors must have been at work to drive up temperatures between 5 and 9 degrees Celsius.
"If this additional warming which we do not really understand, was caused as a response to the CO2 warming, then there is a chance that also a future warming could be more intense than people anticipate right now," Zeebe said.
He said the study suggested there could be atmospheric or ocean processes as yet unknown or poorly understood that might have accelerated the warming. Possibilities could be changes in ocean currents, a much larger release of methane or even greater impacts from higher CO2 levels than currently thought.
At present, CO2 levels have already risen from 280 parts per million to nearly 390 ppm since the Industrial Revolution and could exceed a 70 percent increase during this century, a rate much faster than the Palaeocene-Eocene event, Zeebe said.
While this would cause initial effects, much worse could follow in the coming decades and centuries as the oceans, land and atmosphere tried to deal with the higher CO2 levels, he said.
"The carbon that we put into the atmosphere right now is going to stay there for a very long time. Much of it will stay there for tens of thousands of years."

Biobutanol Creeps Toward the Market

A type of fuel once used in Japanese aircraft during World War II is slowly making its way again toward the market, and its backers say that it will work better in automobiles than ethanol
DuPont and BP hope to produce the fuel, called biobutanol, on a commercial scale starting in 2013. They are currently testing it in Britain, where a demonstration-scale plant should start operations at the end of next year, according to Nick Fanandakis of DuPont’s applied biociences division.
A BP-DuPont takeover of an American biobutanol maker received regulatory approval from the European Commission last week.
The fuel — butyl alcohol derived from plant materials rather than fossil fuels — is being pursued by other companies as well. Last November a private equity company, Patriarch Partners, purchased a disused pulp mill in Maine, with the purpose of refitting it to produce biobutanol derived from maple, birch and beech tree chips.
Construction is expected to start early next year, with production of the fuel to begin in 2011, according to Dick Arnold, who manages the Old Town Fuel and Fiber mill.
Compared with ethanol, “Butanol is a superior fuel in many respects, whether it’s from a handling standpoint or from a usage standpoint or even a chemical standpoint,” said Mr. Arnold. “It’s a higher-grade fuel.”
Its backers say that butanol has a higher energy content than ethanol (Dupont plans to produce fuel with 30 percent more energy than ethanol). It is also easier to transport — unlike ethanol, it can go through pipelines.
The catch is that biobutanol has always been very expensive to produce (which is why it was abandoned after widespread use in the first half of the 20th century). DuPont says it has a new way of making biobutanol, using a microbe. “We will be at a cost-equivalent of ethanol on an energy basis,” predicted Mr. Fanandakis.
Ron Lamberty of the American Coalition for Ethanol said that currently biobutanol’s fuel yield per bushel of corn is currently less than half that of ethanol. But even if biobutanol is able to scale, he saw no competition between it and ethanol. “I guess I see all of these technologies as part of the strategy of making us more energy-independent,” he said.
To be sure, even after it is produced in reasonable volumes, biobutanol faces plenty of regulatory hurdles. It must get approval from the Environmental Protection Agency for use in the United States. The agency must certify that it produces 50 percent fewer greenhouse gas emissions on a “lifecycle” basis than regular gasoline, according to Mr. Fanandakis.

Economy in China Regains Robust Pace of Growth

Fueled by a massive economic stimulus package and aggressive bank lending, China’s economy grew by 7.9 percent in the second quarter of this year, the government said Thursday, a surprisingly strong showing during the global economic downturn.
The gross domestic product figures, released Thursday by the National Statistics Bureau in Beijing, suggest the country’s stimulus policies are working and that the government will meet the 8 percent growth target it set early in the year, analysts say.
While most other major economies are in recession or struggling with anemic growth, China appears to have turned a corner following a sharp slowdown at the end of last year and the beginning of this year, when the pace of growth in the country was cut in half.
“This is a stunning recovery,” said Andy Rothman, an economist at the brokerage firm CLSA in Shanghai. “And it’s also not just the government money fueling the recovery. The private sector is also recovering, and that’s the key.”
After growing at a torrid pace of nearly 13 percent late in 2007, China’s growth dipped to 6.1 percent in the first quarter of this year, the slowest pace in a decade. Some analysts suspect growth during that period was even slower.
But in recent weeks, analysts say they have begun to see signs of robust growth in the Chinese economy, including strong car and property sales, soaring commodity prices, long lines at ports and huge infrastructure projects.
“Demand for steel has rallied strongly in the last six months,” said Jim Lennon, a London-based steel analyst at Macquarie Securities. “Many Chinese steel producers are now operating at full capacity. The Chinese are the only growth market for steel.”
While many countries may be relying on government-funded stimulus projects, China has turned to its state-owned banks, which have already made more than $1 trillion in loans this year.
“This recovery is much more reliant on bank lending,” said Wang Tao, the chief China economist at UBS Securities. “In the last few months, the bank lending has been massive — beyond anyone’s imagination.”
Analysts say the dynamics of the economy have begun to shift slightly this year, away from the once-booming coastal provinces and toward less developed regions in central and western China.
But some analysts remain skeptical about China’s statistics, questioning whether the government is releasing overly rosy figures and masking serious troubles in the economy.
After dropping sharply in the early part of this year, exports have stabilized. But they are still struggling, analysts say. Analysts also point to weak electricity consumption figures and meager foreign investment as indications that growth may not be as strong as reported in official data.
But many analysts say there are more signs of strength than of weakness, and that record bank lending is filtering through the economy and helping drive growth.
“This is probably the only major economy in the world where manufacturing employment is rising,” said Mr. Rothman of CLSA.
Most analysts are now forecasting strong growth for the second half of this year, at close to 9 percent from a year earlier. But there are risks emerging too.
The government has already warned about wasteful government-spending projects, the possibility that overly aggressive lending could lead to a sharp increase in nonperforming loans and the threat of asset bubbles and inflation.
Property prices are skyrocketing again in some parts of the country.
And Shanghai’s stock market is up nearly 70 percent this year, after a huge drop last year.
Some experts say the stock market has been propped up partly by state-owned companies that are once again speculating on stocks rather than investing in their businesses.
The government and many analysts are also worried about asset price inflation and the possibility that aggressive lending from state-owned banks will result in a raft of nonperforming loans in the coming years.
“There are the two biggest worries for the government,” said Ms. Wang of UBS Securities. “It’s impossible to make so many loans in such a short period and not have problems. Two or three years down the road, nonperforming loans could be a serious problem.”

JPMorgan Earnings Soar as It Finds Profit in Slump

Even as it weathers the worst economic downturn in decades, JPMorgan Chase on Thursday announced a $2.7 billion second-quarter profit from stellar trading and investment banking results.
The strong showing may put to rest some worries that the bank was allowed to pay back its $25 billion taxpayer investment too early, after it passed the Treasury Department’s stress test in May. But its quick resurgence in earnings, along with Goldman Sachs’s announcement of a $3.4 billion quarterly profit on Tuesday, is bound to raise fresh concerns about soaring pay levels and growing influence in Washington.
JPMorgan is emerging with renewed confidence, taking advantage of the financial crisis to vault ahead of longtime rivals in investment banking and grab market share in mortgages and retail banking. Jamie Dimon, the chief executive, has cemented his status as one of America’s most powerful and outspoken bankers. And after acquiring the retail bank Washington Mutual last fall, revenue from its new branches is starting to pad its earnings.
Even so, its consumer lending businesses have been battered by the recession. JPMorgan will set aside another $2 billion this quarter to cover future losses, bringing the total amount of money it has socked away to more than $30 billion. Credit card charge-offs have doubled from a year ago, to more than 10 percent of all loans, and will probably wipe out profits in both this year and next. Mortgage and home equity losses continued to climb, though there are some tentative signs that fewer borrowers are falling behind on the payments.
“We don’t know if it is going to sustain itself, but it could have good implications that we are getting nearer to the end,” said Michael J. Cavanagh, JPMorgan’s chief financial officer, during a conference call with analysts on Thursday. Still, he cautioned the economy remains weak and that job losses keep rising; it could be at least two more quarters before the bank stops adding to reserves.
“Nobody is through this until unemployment turns around,” said Moshe Orenbach, a Credit Suisse banking analyst. Bank of America, Citigroup, Wells Fargo face similar challenges when they report their results over the next week. So will scores of smaller, regional and community lenders.
But from its perch as one of the best-managed and most diversified banks, JPMorgan remains an important industry bellwether. JPMorgan said net income in the April-June period rose 36 percent from a year earlier, to $2.7 billion, or 28 cents a share. That compared to the $2.0 billion, or 53 cents a share, it posted a year ago during the early days of the crisis and was better than the 4 cents a share analysts surveyed by Reuters had expected. Revenue soared 39 percent from a year earlier to $25.6 billion.
But the second quarter results include many unusual items, including a $773 million accounting loss tied to an improvement in the bank’s credit spreads. It also took a $419 million after-tax charge after the Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation imposed a special assessment and a $1.1 billion charge on the money it received from the Trouble Asset Relief Program, or TARP. After passing the stress test with flying colors, the bank was deemed healthy enough to repay the taxpayer money in June. Few banks have undergone such a turnaround. Only a few years ago, JPMorgan had been struggling after years of poor management and a failure to digest a series of big acquisitions. But under Mr. Dimon, the bank cut costs and strengthened its balance sheet.
The payoff came last year. With the industry teetering on the verge of collapse, JPMorgan snapped up Bear Stearns in March and Washington Mutual last fall in two government-assisted transactions. Corporate clients say that its growing dominance has given it more leverage to charge for lending and other financial services.
It has also emboldened Mr. Dimon and his management team. After aggressively lobbying to repay the taxpayer money, Mr. Dimon has recently been driving a hard bargain over the repurchase of warrants the government received last fall. JPMorgan is now planning to let the Treasury Department auction off the warrants to private investors after the two sides failed to agree on a price.
Mr. Dimon is also gearing up for a series of battles in Washington. One is over tighter regulations for derivatives, a business where the bank generates lucrative fees as one of the industry’s largest players. Another is the establishment of a new consumer protection agency, which could threaten the profitability of the bank’s mortgage lending and credit card businesses if it introduces tougher regulations.
But in the second quarter, JPMorgan’s investment bank drove its stand-out earnings. Its bankers posted record revenues from helping other financial companies raise capital following the stress test results in May. Traders took advantage of big market swings and less competition to post big gains in fixed-income and equities.
The bank had record investment banking revenue of $7.3 billion. Globally, JPMorgan’s equity capital markets business led all contenders in the first half, rising from third place last year at the expense of Merrill Lynch and Citigroup, with $1.3 billion of revenue and a 14.5 percent share of the market, according to Dealogic data. Goldman Sachs rose to second place, with a 9.9 percent market share, from fourth place.
Chase’s consumer businesses have come under pressure as job losses mount. Over all, retail financial services posted a $15 million profit after setting aside more money as mortgage losses balloon, compared with a profit of $503 million in the period a year earlier.
Retail banking reported net income of $970 million, up from $674 million in the period a year earlier, while losses in the consumer lending businesses ballooned to $955 million, from a net loss of $171 million a year earlier, amid mounting unemployment. Card services, meanwhile, posted a $672 million loss, compared with a year-earlier profit of $250 million, as more cardholders default and revenue falls with the introduction of new rules designed to protect consumers. Mr. Dimon said on a conference call with journalists that the credit card business was unlikely to be profitable in 2009 or 2010.
Excluding the Washington Mutual portfolio, the net charge-off rate on credit cards, a measure of losses, surged to 8.97 percent in the second quarter, up from 6.86 percent in the first quarter.
The bank said in a presentation on its Web site that losses at Chase’s card services unit could reach 10 percent this year, while losses on Washington Mutual’s card portfolio would near 24 percent by the end of 2009.
Total loan-loss reserves rose to $29.1 billion, from $27.4 billion.
The bank said its tier-1 capital ratio, a measure of financial strength, stood at 9.7 percent.
nytimes

U.S. June retail sales rise 0.6%, and inflation exceeds expectations

Higher gasoline prices helped boost June retail sales 0.6% compared with the previous month, the government said Tuesday, but economists worried that prices at the pump would dampen consumers' discretionary spending in the long run. Sales at gas stations rose 5% in June compared with May, the biggest increase of any category. The price of gas went from $2.50 a gallon to nearly $2.64 in June before moderating at the end of the month.
That's actually a bad thing," said Paul Ashworth, senior U.S. economist for Capital Economics. "It's not like consumers are getting any more for their money. It's just costing them more to fill up their vehicle." Wholesale inflation, meanwhile, came in twice the level analysts expected for June, according to a separate government report. The producer price index rose 1.8%, driven by higher fuel prices.
Even excluding volatile food and energy prices, the index rose 0.5%, compared to a 0.1% drop in May and a forecasted rise of 0.1%. The numbers are consistent with other data in recent months that suggest that the economy is not entering into a dangerous process of deflation, in which falling prices lead people to pull back on spending in a self-reinforcing cycle. Retail sales are vital to the nation's economic health, because consumer spending accounts for roughly 70% of the gross domestic product. June marked the second consecutive month of growth, but sales remain 9% below the same month last year. Auto sales had the second-biggest increase, at 2.3%. Electronics and appliance stores also made gains last month, up 0.9%, after struggling to persuade shoppers to buy such big-ticket items as flat-panel TVs. Sporting goods stores also rose 0.9%, and supermarkets inched up 0.2%. But department stores continued to struggle, with sales dropping 1.3%, the largest decline of any category. The report "suggests that real consumer spending continues to stabilize, but is not yet on a firm recovery path," said Patrick Newport, a U.S. economist for IHS Global Insight. Discounting the effect of autos, gas and restaurants, retail sales declined 0.2% in June from the previous month, according to an analysis by the National Retail Federation, a trade group.Its chief economist, Rosalind Wells, said consumers continue to be constrained by the rising unemployment rate and uncertainty about the prospects of recovery. "Although several economic indicators are starting to show signs of improvement, it is going to take a few more months -- maybe longer -- for people to feel comfortable spending again," she said. Industry experts said retailers must remain on guard. According to an analysis by Goldman Sachs and the International Council of Shopping Centers, a trade group, sales at the country's biggest chain stores fell 0.9% last week compared with the previous week. Cooler weather and sparse inventory dragged down the results. "Mother Nature was not kind," said Michael P. Niemira, chief economist for the shopping centers group. "July will likely be another tough month."

Reflective roof paint repels the heat

On bright days, the rooftop of the Anaheim Hilton is so blindingly white that it looks like a mirror positioned directly at the sun. That dazzling glare might just be the greenest thing to happen to the top of a building since solar panels.The white coating deflects nearly 85% of the heat that hits it, reducing the surface temperature by as much as 50 degrees. That means less energy is needed to cool the hotel's interior, cutting air-conditioning costs and carbon emissions.
This is no ordinary coat of paint. Designed by an 82-year-old former military scientist from the Inland Empire, the tinted topcoat is filled with tiny hollow glass balls that deflect heat, layered over a waterproof undercoat made of recycled rubber.The Hilton spent more than $150,000 on the project, which was completed in March. That's $300,000 less than the cost of a conventional repair to the old, leaky roof, said Jerome Annaloro, director of property operations at the hotel. If the reflective material cuts utility costs this summer the way management anticipates it will, Annaloro said, he will recommend white roofs for the entire Hilton chain."I was skeptical at first . . . but the product spoke for itself," he said. "It's a win-win."
Americans spend about $40 billion a year to cool buildings, according to U.S. government figures. So-called cool roofs are being touted as a simple, inexpensive way of lowering surface temperatures on the tops of structures by as much as 100 degrees, cutting operating costs and slowing climate change.Energy Secretary Steven Chu, a Nobel Prize winner in physics, recently called for all roofs to be painted white to promote saving energy. Some scientists suggest that covering dark tar roofs with light-colored coatings could help mitigate the "urban heat island" effect. Development has raised temperatures markedly in many cities, leading to more energy use and smog as well as greater numbers of deaths during heat waves, experts said.But it will take more than the Hilton to make a dent."To change an entire city and save energy all the way around, you need to get to a critical mass," said Scot Horst, senior vice president of the U.S. Green Building Council's Leadership in Energy and Environmental Design rating system. "One or two buildings doesn't make that big of a difference."Mass implementation of cool roofs in the 100 largest cities would offset 44 billion tons of carbon dioxide emissions, or the equivalent of taking 600 million cars off the road for 18 years, researchers at Lawrence Berkeley National Laboratory found last year. Some cities, including Chicago, already have ordinances that require light-colored roofs.Skeptics say white roofs aren't always the eco-friendly panacea they're sometimes made out to be. The reflective component is most effective in sun-saturated regions like the Southwest. And it could lead to higher heating bills in the winter because the sun's warmth can't permeate the roof.Still, the niche is booming. The Energy Department and U.S. Green Building Council are pushing cool roofs to consumers and developers. Entrepreneurs are developing a host of new products using metal, ceramic tile, reflective paints and coatings and even rooftop gardens to beat the heat. Among them is Ronald R. Savin of Rancho Mirage, a serial inventor and holder of nearly 20 patents, who developed the paint atop the Anaheim Hilton.An engineer and retired Air Force colonel who spent much of his military career creating coatings for spacecraft and airplanes, Savin started his own paint company in 1957 and later sold it to a British conglomerate. He slowed down a bit when he reached his 70s, spending more time collecting first-edition books and ornate clocks and less time tinkering.Then, three years ago, he saw a program on the History Channel about recycled rubber. Inspired, he returned to his lab and spent six months experimenting before making a breakthrough on a new paint.His Hyperglass top coat is designed like a Rice Krispies treat. Glass "microspheres," which are used to lighten airplane parts and bowling balls, are suspended in a paint that includes Teflon. The whiter the titanium dioxide tint, the more heat bounces off.Underneath, his Hyperflex primer serves as an insulation layer that also helps prevent water damage and erosion. And because it uses powdered recycled rubber, it helps address another thorny environmental issue: the millions of tires discarded annually in the U.S.The paint could spawn "such a violent change in the paint industry that they won't know what to do," Savin said.Hyperseal paints are free of harmful volatile organic compounds known as VOCs and are relatively cheap to produce, but the company's Palm Desert factory can make only 5 million gallons a year. Most large projects, such as bridges, require several hundred million gallons, Savin said. So he's looking to license his formula to other companies.He'll have plenty of competition. Big players including Sherwin-Williams Co. and Benjamin Moore & Co. are also debuting eco-friendly paints.Still, Savin's product is winning a following. In addition to the Hilton and the roofs of dozens of homes, the rubberized undercoat now covers a large swath of pavement outside a Palm Desert Wal-Mart.He also hopes to expand the use of the paint to other structures such as shipping cargo containers and dams to prevent rust.Rancho Mirage resident David Baron credits Hyperseal paint with helping him cut his $2,500-a-month summer electricity bill by more than half. Living without air conditioning in 110-degree heat just wasn't an option."I gave it a shot because I was looking for anything to help," said Baron, who spent $10,000 to cover the roof of his 5,600-square-foot house. "We're talking huge energy savings. This will pay for itself in a year or two."It's those kind of stories that keep the octogenarian Savin going. He claims to sometimes test new batches at 3 a.m. His house is beset with swipes of paint -- on the rusted gate, on labeled bricks by the pool. The mulch around an outdoor fountain consists of recycled rubber chunks.His laundry room is a makeshift lab, where paint spackles the washer and dryer and rubber blackens the sink. Even the parking lot at the 15,000-square-foot factory is checkered with paint."He ran out of room at his own house," said Loch Jones, Hyperseal Inc.'s director of marketing. "If you're a friend of the colonel's, watch your driveway."